Sauron at the Gates!
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| Brilliant Photoshopping courtesy Philadelphia Will Do |
It’s comforting to know that our elected officials can really grasp a nuanced concept and break it down into terms we common folk can understand. Take global terrorism, for example: In comments made earlier this week, U.S. Senator Rick Santorum (R-PA) equated terrorists to the “Eye of Mordor” trying to harass the hobbits scaling Mount Doom (no kidding—read it here) and went on to say that right now, the Eye of Mordor (ed.: Don’t you mean the Eye of Sauron, Rick?) has been drawn away from the U.S. to Iraq. Hooray! We’re safe! Mission accomplished!
First of all, if the terrorists are Sauron and the U.S. hobbits, then who the heck is Saruman? The Fighting Uruk-hai? Gollum? Where is Mount Doom? How does Gandalf fit in here, and what does Tom Bombadil really stand for?
And if this is the best analogy—the best thinking—a U.S. legislator can do on a subject, can we possibly trust his judgment when looking at such a nuanced and fraught issue as stem-cell research? I can’t wait to hear the analogy he comes up with for that (Perhaps the evil chest creature from Alien exploding out of the great stomach that is America?).
If you have any other ideas as to who belongs where (Osama bin Laden? Tony Blair? Poland?) in the Santorum LotR mythos, please let us know. And frankly, I’m dying to hear some more fantasy/sci-fi metaphors for the big issues of today. So we common folk can understand, see? —Martha Harbison













hahaha that's funny. I bet that Sauron is North Korea.
Posted by: Shifty Powers | October 19, 2006 at 01:49 PM
Gollum = Sadam Hussein
Boromir = France (We love hobbits, we hate hobbits, we love hobbits)
England = Sam Gamgee
Australia/Canada = Merry/Pippin
Zarqawi = Saruman
Al'Qaida = Fighting Uruk-hai, minus the (comparatively) high Uruk-hai intelligence
Posted by: B. Battleshield | October 19, 2006 at 02:42 PM
I think the writer is reading way too much into this.
Posted by: J. Nielsen | October 20, 2006 at 02:23 PM
Okay, you think the writer is reading too much into this and I think Santorum is way too nuts to be representing millions of people in the U.S. Senate. We're even. I don't think anyone could ever read too much into this; it's hillarious!
Posted by: Lauren Bingham | October 20, 2006 at 03:07 PM
Exactly why is this of any interest to a SCIENCE magazine? Why can't SCIENCE magazines report on science without EVERYTHING being about politics? Does your editorial slant have to permeate eveything anymore, or can we focu on SCIENCE?!!
Posted by: Wade Blanchard | October 20, 2006 at 04:13 PM
Wade, Santorum hates science except perhaps that kooky stuff called creation science. He is the number two highest ranked US Senator. As such he exercises a lot of power over the direction of scientific research in this country. Lots of right wing nut jobs like him want to destroy science because it conflicts with their literal bible based worldview. Politics and religion have invaded science, not the other way around.
Posted by: Turnbuckle667 | October 20, 2006 at 04:54 PM
Right, I get it. You all read How the Republicans Destroyed Science and feel so superior, so we get politics dragged into everything. Can't SOMEBODY give me good solid science news, instead of the latest "sexy" controversy, without an editorial spin. I realy just want the news. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR?!!
Posted by: Wade Blanchard | October 21, 2006 at 08:17 AM
I hate Santorum and Science...Who's Santorum
Posted by: "Dubba" | October 21, 2006 at 12:34 PM
Wade, you want pure science news, and lots of it? try http://www.sciencedaily.com
Posted by: JRCreations | October 21, 2006 at 02:38 PM
Yet another example of a political agenda being perpetuated through an "unbiased" media outlet. What a surprise.
I'm with Wade; why can't you people stick to science, instead of spouting out political propoganda disguised as "science headlines?" If I wanted that I'd go to cnn.com or foxnews.com.
Posted by: David | October 22, 2006 at 02:08 AM
Sauron was cool. What kind of Trilogy would you have without Sauron? Where would the heroes be? What would Gimli be doing - digging rocks - yeah that's exciting. Legolas? Hair products. Boromir? NASCART. Strider? Tour guide. Gandalf? Econ prof. Hobbits? Spud-growing-hairy-toed-flea-bitten-shire-rats. With the ring destroyed they sailed overseas. They went sailing for god's sake! Then they all died of boredom. The End.
Posted by: Scramjetter | October 22, 2006 at 05:19 PM
United States = Frodo Baggins (The Precious Petroleum came to us, it's ours, we need it, the precious petroleum. The petroleum we must give up if our World is to survive)
No,no, it's not "How the Republicans Destroyed Science" it's "How Regan Destroyed Science" it was Regan's administration after all who wrote policies based on the firm belief that Christ was coming soon, and so anything they did was of no real consequence.
Gandalf = Jesus (He came and sacrificed Himself for our sakes, and He'll be back to save us, again)
Republicans are just agressively stupid people who will believe anything if you tell them it came from the Bible, even though most of them have never read the Bible, or adhere to any of it's principles. Besides, I have yet to meet a Republican with enough smarts to destroy science: so don't break your spine as you pat yourself on the back there Turnbuckle.
The companion novel to "How Regan Destroyed Science" is "The Burning Bushes: How Father and Son replaced Logic and Reasoning with Deception and Intemperance"
Posted by: Sam | October 23, 2006 at 02:35 AM
For a forum that is supposed to be based on rational, evidence supported argument (remember the scientific method?) there is a lot of mud slinging and irrational opinion going on here. Apart from regurgitating someone elses opinion, there is little evidence that decisions are being made based on the imminent end times. Moreover, the so-called religious right is not the only threat to science. Fung-shui, herbal medicines, theraputic touch ring a bell? Sen. Tom Harkin siphoning off millions of useful research dollers to fund "alternative" medicine because he thought bee pollen cured his allergies? Is it just possible that the editors of this website could be a little balanced, or maybe just stick to science and not go out of their way to start a fight? If this is what it takes to sell magazines, I'll spend my money elsewhere.
Posted by: Wade Blanchard | October 23, 2006 at 07:42 AM
Want Pure science news? Kurzweilai.net - sign up for the daily newsletter - all the bleeding edge science news you can swallow.
Posted by: B. Battleshield | November 01, 2006 at 04:47 PM
To return to the authors request for other, like, current issues and how they like, relate to pop culture.....um.... I , like....kinda think that the HP Board leak scandal is akin to Reservoir dogs....
Posted by: B. Battleshield | November 01, 2006 at 04:50 PM