Segway Enthusiasts Club No Longer Enthusiastic

The Segway Enthusiasts Group of America announced today that it will disband after a period of inactivity and an absence of candidates for its board of directors. Apparently the dorky-looking “human-transporter,” which travels at a heart-thumping max speed of 12 mph and costs upward of $5,000, isn’t garnering a whole lot of enthusiasm anymore. Ya think?

The glut of joke possibilities here just blew the fuses in my brain for a second.

Segway spokeswoman Carla Vallone told reporters that the group’s demise is not an indicator that the company itself is failing—in fact, she says sales have grown 50 percent annually since 2002. That’s pretty massive growth, right? So where are these hordes of Segway riders, and why don’t they want to join the Segway fan club? Are they so nerdy they can’t even manage social interactions with each other? Or are they all sequestered in some secret, underground, Mountain View-based programmer lair? I’m imagining a buzzing rabbit-warren of corridors, built just wide enough for two Segways to pass concurrently, silent but for the clacking of keyboards and the hum of human-transporter traffic… —Megan Miller

Comments

[C. Pineiro]

I just fell off my Segway. Tears were streaming down my face as I hit the ground.

That's how hard I was laughing after reading your cute and woefully innacurate piece about Segways and one of it's fan clubs: Seg America. There were problems with their election process which is too detailed to explain here, so you took a cheap shot at Segway and it's "nerdy" rider as you were trying to write comedy. Did you do it all by yourself, Megan, or did someone help you with the big words?

Over 30,000 Segways are safely riding on sidewalks around the world, many of them saving car trips and gas.

Anyone writing a blog on Popsci.com should have more sense, or learn how to write comedy. Try to do one of these next time you do a piece here.

[John R.]

To those who haven't seen a Segway in real use as an alternative to a car / motorcycle / scooter / bike, please your comments are just crazy making! I live in downtown Austin, I love to walk, but I don't like to walk in 100 degree weather for 20+ minutes each direction. I own two bikes, I get sweaty on my bikes, I road race on them and treat them as an exhilarating form of exercise - but I have an office job and I like to dress up - bikes aren't a great substitute for just getting around. My motorcycle is fun, but I see it as a pain in the ass as I have to "gear up" for it and still have to deal with parking problems. I love my Segway, I can zip around town, stay connected to people on the streets, engage with other pedestrians, and turn a 1-2 hour walking trip into a 30 minute Segway trip - and no parking. You people love to mock the idea of Segways but have no comment about the vast majority of obese Americans who drive their SUV the 1/2 mile to the supermarket. Segway riders look "weird"? Are we still in middle school? I wonder if the first bike riders were mocked?! Of course they were, it's human nature (as you are unfortunately proving).

[Segway Online]

I love Segways and think that there are plenty of great uses for Segways. I really have do disagree on them being nerdy; I don't consider myself a nerd, but if having a segway makes me nerdy go ahead and label me.

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